☞ Anyone who looks at this entry has to post this meme and their current wallpaper.
☞ Explain in no more than five sentences why you're using that wallpaper!
☞ Don't change your wallpaper before doing this! The point is to see what you had on!



Explanation: I was working on my pawpads for a future suiter, and I thought I'd make this my desktop for multiple reasons. Including the caption "Do not look, the furries will scare your children!"

There are only a few moments in life where I've become speechless with emotion. One of those was when my house burned down and I lost everything. Another was when my father sent me and my mother to the hospital. But never in my life, never ever have I been forced into silence by sheer feeling of love and happiness. Until today. Until the love of my life, Duma Country Tiger, told me this. (was_here_15=me, chris165778= My love =3 )

We started off the conversation about FWA, and he told me he had a surprise for me. He showed me the FWA site, and told me he was getting the 160 dollar God sponsorship. I was happy, because I know he'd enjoy himself. Then, he said he was buying me one too =3 The following conversation is what happens after.


was_here_15: You don't need to do that, love =3 I'll pay for it. I want you to use your money to get you something special =)
chris165778: U deserve it think of it as a graduation present
was_here_15: Awwww =3 You're the most wonderful person ever, love =)
was_here_15: Really though. You do enough for me as it is =) It'd make me feel better if you used it to get you something you want =)
chris165778: And when u graduate college the day u graduate is the day im gonna ask u to take my hand in marriage

This. This right here is what dreams are made of. This is my dream, and I'm living it =) And this is for the love of my life. The day you propose to me, is the day I will take your last name forever, and be by your side forever, and love you forever, and be Mr. and Mr. Tankersley =) I'll be there for you until the day I draw my last breath, and that last breath will be used telling you I love you.

This moment is without a doubt the greatest moment in my life, and if there is a god, or some other kind of all powerful being, I say this. Thank you, for everything.

I love him I love him I love him! He's the most wonderful Tiggy in the world! A Tiggy infact, whom just asked me to be his mate for life! =3 It's also his birthday tomorrow, and I have a few birthday presents for him! One of which is the icon thingy I did for him in photoshop! 




The next is a beautiful poem I wrote just for him! =3

Well, my 18th birthday's finally over. It was a calm day, nothing happening at all. Dinner comes around and we have spaghetti, nothing special. My mom got a pretty good cake. Then it comes time to open presents, and there's only one thing on the table. It's a bag with a Barely Legal magazine in it. For those of you who don't know, I'm gay. I guess it's my fault for not telling anyone, but....1 present? I know I'm not worth much, I know I probably deserve less than most people. But...1 present? Do I suck that much? Am I that horrible of a person? I mean, I know I wasn't going to be showered with love or anything...but a single, straight person's naughty magazine? Oh well....I guess I should get used to it. Atleast I even get to wake up in the morning.

A new short story I put up describing the start of my day =)

*copied from Kravenlupei.

"Leave me a comment and I will reply with why I like you. If I don't know you, I'll either make something up or tell you why I like your LiveJournal. You must pay for the privilege by posting a message like this one on your LiveJournal."

=3 So, you comment and I'll shower you with love =3

With my trip to Florida/Alabama, and the trip to the Rocky Mountains I recently took, including all the trips in between, I estimate that I have traveled over 6000 miles in this summer alone. I'm not going to say I didn't have wonderful summer, and I mean -wonderful-, but I'm ready to hunker down and vedge until the beginning of the school year. This is the first time this wolf can ever say that he's anxious for school =3 Senior year is going to -rock out loud-.

Thanks for all the people that have been patient with me (especially my lovey wuvy tiggybutt), I hope to talk to you more now that I can actually stay at home and not worry about taking some cross country trip to some place I've never been.

On another note, I know that Oklacon will be popping up soon, and hopefully I can go to my first convention then. =3 If I will be able to go, see you all there. If not, there's still Furry Fiesta! 

                                                                  -Your neighborhood hugglewoof.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NOkQ4dYVaM
Awesomeness. I want to read it now.

On another note, I just found out last night that the only thing I ever counted as an achievement was a lie, and that I'm gullable. Also, the only person whom ever loved me, my mother, didn't even want me when I was a kid. Like usual, another happy day in my life. Cheers!

I waent to an RV park party and had a few ribs, then got wasted on rum an
d coke, Sorry friends who I promised to, I feel bad, but so much better rightnow. If you feel like excommunicating me from your friendship and stuff, go ahead. On another note, rum and warm coke roxxors the soxxors! Love Texywolf!

For the last 4 days, I've been in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado. Talk about natural beauty! The days were cold, the nights were...cold. The water was....cold! In my case, it was because right when we came in, a freak cold front blew in =3 It was rainy every night, but we had a nice bonfire out that kept us warm! Camping at about 10,500 ft. is pretty rugged, as a Texan, I had to get accustomed to going out of breath every time I walked up a hill =3 I went white water rafting for the first time, over the Royal Gorge. We went through class 5 and 4 rapids! (Class 6 is unsurvivable, so I figured I did really good =3) Halfway through the rafting trip, it began to hail ice the size of grapes, and flood like a mofo, lawl. After about 30 seconds of sting, I got over it and got back to paddling, which surprised the Ohio people we were rafting with. I practically laughed through the whole storm, even when we were going over rapids in which we couldn't see about 5 feet in front of us =3 At the end, me and my dad gave a big YEEHAW, and all of the people gave us the look that reaked of "Crazy ass Texans....", lawl. I'm back in Texas, in a Super 8 motel room in Plainview. I'll be in and near Austin for the next 4 or 5 days, then I'll be back home =3 Thank you for the people who gave me good bye huggles when I left! *huggles back* I'll be talking to you all a little in the next couple of days, so keep in touch! Texy out!

I'll be heading out to Colorado for about two weeks, to spend some quality time with my dad. I'll be going whitewater rafting for the first time, and I sure hope it's fun! Just wanted to say goodbye and *huggles* to everyone while I still have the chance.

I drink alot. Like, enough each night to get me buzzed and not paranoid, like someone who smokes cigarettes. I promised my friends I wouldn't drink anymore, and now it feels like I'm going through a withdrawal >.< A FREAKING BEER WITHDRAWAL! Pitiful. I'm shaky and like, scratching at my leg and stuff, lol. Someone brought up a good question though, maybe I should replace my drinking with pot or something. Or like, smokes. I feel crazy right now >.< Suggestions PLEASE!

Another night being passed off wasted and lonely, cheers, my LJ world!

I will be going to college soon, and I hear that a laptop is very useful.

A) It helps for the studying when you're on campus and, let's face it, who wants to be in a room when your roommate and his lady/man are getting it on, so you decide to go out and do a little studying.

B) I know this doesn't happen alot, but people still do take their laptops out and write their notes with them.

Plus, with my writing carreer ahead of me, I'd like to be able to write when not at home. My current price range for a laptop is $600, and I don't need anything too special. I just want to get the most bang for the buck. So, suggestions?

I just found out my last boyfriend, the one I walked in on who was spooning to some other booty call, was going out with not one, but two other people. One of which he'd been going out with for a long while. Oh happy happy joy joy, another awesome day in the life of the greatest dissappointment on the planet! I feel like getting crying ass drunk again....

This is what true love is like. No matter what your lover does, you will be happy, because as long as he or she is happy, that's all you ever really need. I feel torn between my love for him, and my wanting to see him be happy no matter what.


"Waiting, watching, hope and happiness.
 Waiting for your lover's warm embrace.
 Watching for your lover's happiness.
 Hoping, that he loves you back,
 Happy, no matter what occurs.
 Because he is content.
 And if you love him,
 It is all you need,
 To be complete."
                            
                                Written by a loving wolf to his sweet tiger.
                            I hope whatever you decide, that you're happy.

I just found out that during the two weeks I took off with my family for a family reunion, my mate was cheating on me with at least 2 other people.  I don't know what to say. I opened up to him, and let him inside of me, physically and mentally. I told him some of my most inner, deepest secrets and feelings. I thought he felt the same way =( I come back, and find his ass cuddling with some other bullshit booty call, who I'm sure, is under 18. We all argued, and it ended up with pretty much the two of us against him, after finding out that we had both been cheated on. He ends up yelling out that he'd been sleeping with another guy, and that he didn't need us and that we can both go die for all he cares. The other guy leaves with tears in his fucking eyes, and I'm sure that he's as hurt as I am. Now, all I want to fucking do, is get wasted and make this pain go away. I know that my dad has a stash of vodka, and I'm sure as hell going to get trashed on it. I just want to know if the reason I am getting wasted for is right.

This is just a little emotional outlet from me, after keeping it in for 5 years and letting it simmer.


Every night, my mother would sing the most wonderful song for me. Hush little baby, don't say a word. It was a song that, at many times, would put me to sleep after a rough night of turmoil. She would sing it for me, every night, no matter what. Even if she had been beaten only minutes before. I remember one night, her singing the lullaby to me, tears in her eyes, and blood on her face. I remember her singing that lullaby with her beautiful and melodic voice, and her dropping my tear stained eye lids in a heartbeat.

This all changed one night when words and fists went too far. The next day, my mom and dad decided to divorce. My mom tore me and my brother from my father, and my father from the two of us. Back then, I applauded the brave actions of my mother. Now, I look back on that decision and shudder. It was the ultimate breaking point of our family, and the beginning of a cold life spent being fought over by a loving mother and father. My mother stopped singing that lullaby to me that night. Now, I have realized in my lonely heart, that the only way I will ever see my family together again, is at my funeral, mourning over my cold grave and unmoving corpse.

The moral of my story, I guess, is to tell people that they don't know what love really is until they lose it. When you have love, and you know what it feels like, it's like you're being wrapped in a giant warm blanket. When it gets taken away from you, it's like you're ripped out of that and thrown out into the frozen street.

I just got back from Roanoke, Alabama, and I'm in Pensacola. I got to see my step dad's old place,  which is one of those ancient log cabins you hear about from the 1800s. Other than riding four wheelers, and getting to see my very extended pseudo family, I was sleeping or worse the entire time. I got completely trashed after getting tired of watching my Mom get so drunk that she started crying. I have a question, is it still wrong to drink if you're under aged, as long as you have a reason to get drunk for?